No, I didn’t say it wrong.
You have to learn how to get excited about losing. Not in life. Not in tournament. But in training. Hell yes.
See, the problem is that there’s training, and then, there’s testing. And they aren’t the same. Testing, is when the outcome is important. Self defense, tournaments, etc., but on the mat in the gym, that’s training. That’s where you want weaknesses, and holes in your game exposed. That’s where you try moves that you’re not good at yet and pay the price. And that’s awesome. Every time you get beat, you have the chance to improve something. You have the chance for your Jiu-Jitsu to grow! That should be exciting. Awesome, in fact.
Honestly, if you aren’t tapping in training, you aren’t improving.
If you’re going against someone challenging you’ll have to tap sometimes.
If you’re trying new moves, you’ll get exposed, and caught sometimes.
If you’re exhausted enough you’ll get caught sometimes.
So, find better people to train with. Or expand your game with the people you do have. Or, I don’t know, maybe train until you are fatigued, and then the newest scrub will give you a run.
I suppose, that somewhere, there exists an UberMan that is in such great shape that it is impossible for him to feel fatigued, and while training with the best people at his disposal, can still try moves he’s never done, AND STILL not ever be in danger of being caught.
But let’s face it. That ain’t you.
So, if you never tap, get out of the kiddie pool, try new stuff, and train till exhaustion.
If you tap and it pisses you off, grow up. That’s the only time you get better! Embrace the opportunity. If I could only have one training partner for the rest of my life, and I had to pick between someone I can tool on, or someone I can barely survive against, no question I’d pick the latter. I’ll get better. And be pumped to train every damn day!
I never smile as much as when I’m in danger on the mat; that’s where the puzzle gets fun!